Beauty Movie Review: GOON

“Two things: Don’t touch my #$%&in’ percocets, and do you have any #$%&in’ percocets?”  What a way to introduce a movie!  I have been giddy with anticipation for today, ever since I caught wind of a lil’ hockey movie called ‘Goon’, and watched the trailer shortly after.

For a R-rated version, you can watch this.  There’s cussing!  If you’re into that stuff.

First and foremost, Stiffler (also known as Sean William Scott in the real world) will be known as Doug Glatt from now on after this performance, which will forever be remembered in our books.  He pulled out an absolute beauty performance as a minor league hockey enforcer ‘touched by the fists of God’. His character was actually based on the true life story of Doug Smith.

Sabertooth… is played by Liev Schreiber…?  His name is Liev, like Lee-ev?  Well, anyway Sabertooth also comes up big as the seasoned vet, a Marty McSorely inspired enforcer, in Ross Rhea.  Liev also played Sabertooth in X-Men. Totally different movie.

The inevitable Donnybrook between the new kid on the block and the old man was still an edge of your seat tilt, full of suspense. The movie overall was hilarious. The one liners go shift-for-shift with all the great Slap Shot dialog of old and the actual hockey scenes were leaps and bounds better than any clip from Young Blood.

Bottom-line, this is an epic hockey, nay, sports movie for the ages.

However, while watching the movie, I couldn’t help but make connections to my own life.  Not that I am a feared enforcer… in fact, I’m pretty embarrassing. But that doesn’t mean I won’t take a few punches for a team mate. That is beside the point.  Sure, I made connections, I have definitely played with, and “been” a lot of guys portrayed in this flick. But the biggest connection I made was the divided acceptance and disdain for fighting in hockey, and in our case, box lacrosse.

It made me instantly link to the hissy fits that go back and forth here on the LAS Network about fighting. Even though I am sure a few new people have came around since hearing some compelling arguments, the debate against fighting still lingers. This movie realistically depicts the role of an enforcer and what it means to him as player, and what it means to his coaches and team mates he plays for and protects.

goon movie poster

Goon.

There are many reasons why fighting needs to exist in hockey and box lacrosse. However, none is more brain-dead obvious than the existence of an entire semi-professional league. If fighting did not exist in professional hockey, minor league franchises would not be able to draw crowds in the southern United States. The reality of it is, the SPHL exists for the soul purpose that those fans come to see fights. There is a market for fighting, and a large market at that. A large enough market to support an entire league.

Goon is a violent-romantic-comedy, I was in stitches and tense with anticipation during the entire 92 minutes. However, Goon does not glorify fighting. It highlights and provides positive reinforcement as to why fighting is necessary and respected in hockey, and in our case, box lacrosse.

Get out, go see it. Share and express your opinions on the movie and fighting in hockey and box lacrosse in the comment section. If you really want to get into it hit me up on twitter!

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  • http://twitter.com/NickoSnipes Nick Sentoso

    Bottom-line, this is an epic hockey, nay, sports movie for the ages….  Are you kidding? This movie was brutal. What the hell were you watching?

  • Chris Fox

    Well Nicki Minaj, its not like Goon will be at the head of the line this time next year to collect its Oscar for ‘Best Picture’. Take it for what its worth. If you wanted a cinematic master piece, next time I will review Mean Girls for you.

  • Jeff McLean

    what a jofa comment…. go back to watching nickelodean, listening to nickleback,  playing nick nack paddy whack and giving your dog your bone, while eating mentos-o.. jabroni…

    in other news. this movie better be getting an oscar… this film had the beauty knob cranked to 12.

  • Michael Jones

    I might go see it. 

  • Michael Jones

    What ??? I don’t wanna seem rude but I have no idea what you are talking about. 

  • Chris Fox
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  • http://www.facebook.com/sam.elkind Sam Elkind

    loved this movie. “its not gay if we’re brothers” “if your brothers, its gay with a splash of something else”